My Madhubala

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I saw her daily in the morning when she woke up from her bed. I saw her as she got ready to go to work. Standing at the window, staring at her as she came to the window of her room in the opposite building and put her wet towel to dry out in the sun, was getting to be a ritual. But she never ever turned her gaze up to look at me. In fact, for so many days now, I had not seen her face; only her figure, as she carried about her daily tasks. Then she would step out, again her head lowered, and walk off to the bus stop to take a bus to work. For days together, I was trying to muster enough strength to go down and follow her to the bus stop so that at least once I could see her face; but never could. Those were difficult times for me, young and fresh just out of college from a small town; trying to make it out in the city. All the smells and scenes and the people in the city were alien to me. Work was tough; trying to keep alive on what meagre amount I could earn was even tougher. I used to go to work late in the afternoon and return past midnight; tired and fed up; dreaming about the quiet countryside that I had grown in; gearing up to get some sleep in the raucous neighbourhood rokettube that seemed to have more street dogs than men. And then there was her….she seemed to me like a statue of peace in all that mayhem. All the surroundings that harassed me did not seem to flutter her a bit; she carried out her daily routine like a robot unfazed by anything that happened around her. I never saw her come in as whenever I came home, which was pretty often after midnight, the lights in her small room were off. I imagined her, sleeping peacefully like a child. In a way, she gave me strength to go about the daily struggle. But it intrigued me as well…how could someone be so calm as to not raise her head even to look at the person who stared at her daily…in the hope that she would gaze up once and show her face. But her gaze was probably always fixed to her toes…Until that day when all illusions were shattered.It was a Sunday. Never before had I seen her come out of her small room on Sundays. I used to stay in my room all day too, as I never had enough money to step out and let go a bit. All I could do was sit around in my small room on the third floor of a dilapidated building trying asyalı porno to get a glimpse at the window opposite to my room…her window. On that particular Sunday, at about 10:00 in the morning, I saw her opening the window; which was pretty unusual. I raced to mine to get a glance. There she was staring up at me; I still vividly remember that sight. She had caught me red-handed (or probably red-faced) and still I stood there shamelessly, not knowing what to do. In a minute, the window closed…but I still stood there transfixed…she was beautiful! Her face was like a baby; nice chubby cheeks and dark eyes too big for the face. Small rounded nose decorated by a small ring…she had an almost rustic charm. She had not smiled at me, or maybe there was a hint of smile on her face; as if she was mocking me. I was still standing there staring at that closed window for I remember not how many minutes, when the doorbell shattered my reverie. I was irritated with the thought of my landlord knocking at my door as he always did on Sundays, to check what I had made of his room and to collect the rent. With a smirk on my face, I went and opened the door, azeri porno still more irritated as my sweet memory of her got disturbed. It wasn’t the landlord, but a small boy, whom I had seen many times across the street standing there with a piece of paper in his hand. He ran away the moment he handed me the paper, before I could utter a single word. On that piece of paper were two magical words….come over. It did not take me long to understand who had sent the message. My curiosity was about to get settled. It was a feeling that you get when you get your final exams result sheet. I got dressed quickly and moved. I almost raced to her door, with my heart racing even faster but before I knocked, I hesitated. Till that day, she was an illusion for me, and now, she would no longer be. Was I ready to break the shackles or would I be happier knowing her as I always did, an enigma. The door was opened before I could knock and I was ushered in by her. The room was simple, just one single bed, one cupboard and a writing desk with chair; but it was very neat and clean. She was standing in the middle of the room asking me to sit but I just stood there dumbfounded looking at that gorgeous face…the face that had avoided me all these days; the face that I had designed and redesigned in my mind. But this one was even more beautiful than what I had ever imagined. Eventually, I did sit down, her words almost imperceptible to my mind.

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